Geckos

I kinda want a panther gecko but mom said no… Figures. But being the stubborn and determined person I am I wrote a six paragraph essay about how to take care of the animal, how much it costs, and why I should get one. It convinced her!! But then her alterior motive came into play… Guilt. “maybe instead of getting a new pet you should focus on the ones you already have” my two dogs. I like dogs and all but everybody has a dog! What I really want is to get attention. My parents never were married so I’ve spent my entire life jumping back and forth between houses. My dads to my moms my dads to my moms my whole life! It’s not as easy as it sounds. I don’t love going to my dads because of Carrie… Step mother. She never really has gotten used to it and neither have I. She never makes me feel welcome. But any way off topic. I constantly seek attention partially because I’m self absorbed and quiet but also because I don’t get a lot of the stuff… Attention I mean. My mom doesn’t set up many boundaries and my dad sets up too many. There isn’t any balance. I have a little half brother and a little half sister both are very attention consuming… “buy them more treats and train them more. Take them on more walks” And then my mom of course changes the subject by saying that she thinks that she wants another kid.
Some times I wonder if she even sees my struggling attempts to grab attention. And when I do get even a scrap of attention I gobble it up but try to make it last forever… Like a dog.